With delicious heartthrobs like David Beckham setting the standard for male beauty, it’s totally hip these days for your guy to be metrosexual. It just means his grooming habits may rival yours — and that he may occasionally steal your moisturizer, borrow your hair highlighting kit, use your tweezers and hog the bathroom longer than you ever did. But if you’re just getting back into the man pool, or you’ve slept through the whole metrosexual revolution, you might find all of this a little confusing.

After all, gay men tend to exhibit metrosexual behavior, but being metrosexual can apply to straight men, gay men and everything in between. So it begs a classic Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City-type of question: How do you know if the guy you’re seeing is merely metrosexual or kinda gay? There are no books on this, so here’s a purely unscientific, loose primer for sorting out who’s who.

Your Man: Metrosexual or Kinda Gay?