Most have fallen into relationships with men who are egregiously unsuitable partners. Not men who became difficult, but men whose behavior from the beginning was a blinking neon sign warning Bad Mate Material.

They had had affairs, were drinkers or drug users, had personality problems, lied about themselves, couldn’t hold a job. That kind of thing. And often enough, no matter how loutish the partner, leaving isn’t an easy option. Sometimes they’re still struggling to make the guy pay attention to them, or they don’t have the financial independence to break away, or there are children they need help with, or the depression is so severe they can’t see out.

Smart People Make Mistakes